Chapter 1

Man! This was undoubtedly one of the happiest days of my life. 8lbs. 9oz. Beautiful. Strong. Healthy. What an incredible gift from God, amazingly unlocking emotions I never knew I was even capable of experiencing. There was nothing that could have prepared me more for this incredible moment. And I do mean nothing. It had been almost 2 years now since I’d eulogized my single life, though I must admit I’ve had my challenges. O.K. Struggles. But none of that seemed to matter right now. I’d dreamt at least a thousand times about this moment, rehearsing it within my mind like a seasoned actor.

My wife and I frequently talked about the birth of our first child, consuming our late night “pillow talks” into the wee hours of the night, totally oblivious to the fact that we both had work the next morning. Still we were hopelessly enslaved and held hostage by the anticipation of being a “new parent”, for this became our nightly ritual. A far cry from our past nightly ritual that we shared together, debating over, “why there’s no need to hang out with your friends on the weekends anymore, now that you’re married”. Maybe the frustration had something to do with the fact of coming home those nights between 1 and 2 in the morning. This was the struggle I spoke of earlier but, I’m better now. And so is my marriage.

And incredibly enough, upon the arrival of my first born, it just happened to be a boy! Yes! A boy! Please don’t get me wrong, a girl would have given me just as much joy and admiration but, a boy! Are you kidding me? A tiny replica of myself destined to take the world by storm. I could see it now: Heisman trophy winner, All American, MVP, etc… And oh yeah, a doctor, lawyer, scientist, (don’t judge me), I was getting to that. This is just too overwhelming! I guess I never really was prepared for this moment at all. And what is it they say? “A grown man is not supposed to cry?” Well, too late for that.
It’s also too late for apologies and regrets, as my adrenaline is now sedated by my own reality that now takes center stage for a surreal performance that will reluctantly open Pandora’s Box. No disguise. No holding back. Just——- the inevitable coming full circle that leads to my unwanted encore because now I’m left with the possibilities, for now I must figure out a way in which to tell my wife about my first born child.

Stay tuned for the next chapter…